Last week I stirred the pot a bit with this particular Question. Where is your hand print on the crime scene? We’re jumping in right where we left off, so please read last week’s installment on leadership so this one makes sense!
I remember working with an executive who was always complaining about some problem in his company. Inevitably it boiled down to his people and how they created his misery or the problems he had to fix. When I would hear him complain, I started to ask “who hired these people”, “who trained these people”, “who is managing these people” and “who allows this to go on”. I didn’t ask him in order to put him on the spot but to help look at where he might have contributed.
Just to be fair, I have been caught in the same trap. In a previous position, I didn’t get along with one of my peers, it was obvious, everyone knew it and it was causing real harm to the company. (Cue my victim story): Just to be clear, he was a jerk, he was incompetent and he needed to be fired. Finally it all came to head and I walked out of a staff meeting.
Afterwards, I realized that might not have been the smartest move and that the president of the company was probably going to come pay me a visit. Another leader might have launched into a number of different reactions: “You two need to get along”, “Don’t ever do that again”, “Why did you let him get to you” and possibly even firing me for insubordination. He didn’t do that; he sat down in my office, looked at me calmly and simply asked “What is this about for you”. Had he asked me anything else, I would have put on my armor and gone to war over that idiot. My boss didn’t let me do that. He made me look at myself. The reality was it had everything to do with me. He knew that even if this other person were fired, the underlying issue would still exist and would surface again. Don’t you think I would have had to work with another idiot again?
I have been trying to find better ways to ask questions about personal accountability without creating defensiveness. The key is to ask the questions without the eyes of judgment, the mind of persecution and the heart of superiority. By asking without judgment we can provide someone with the space for others to truly look inward and explore where they might have some hand print on the crime scene. The following are ways you might help this person explore their accountability:
In what way might you have contributed?
If you were to go back in time, what would you have done differently?
I clearly hear your frustration with this other person, what might they say if I asked them how you might have contributed?
What is it about you that makes this very difficult?
What is this about for you?
If you could have done anything differently, what would you have done?
I hope these insights will help you call on your leadership skills and navigate corporate crime scenes in the future!
Until next time,
Doug